Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Everything is BIGGER in Texas

The following story is true.  The names have been changed for no apparent reason. 

Do you all know what is an AMAZING STUNT BRA?????  We didn't think so.  Feast your eyes and listen up...you're about to see and read about h-i-s-t-o-r-y!  Everything you see on the table came out of our celebrity's BRA--the AMAZING STUNT BRA. 

We here at Chippys were in awe...we still are.  We witnessed the unloading at Zapp Hall Beer Garden during the Fall shows.  No LIE! 

TC_UNK[1]

 

The inventory includes the following:

1 set of car keys

1 cell phone

1 wine/bottle opener

1 lipsitck tube

1 rather large wad of cash

1 digital camera

1 stack of business cards

2 rather voluptuous bosoms

 

nOW That you've picked your jaw up off of the floor listen up!  This is technology we've got to employ in the war on terror!!!!!  Imagine if the Brits had this in their MI6. 

This is a huge, pardon the pun, opportunity for the females of the world to make great strides in a predominately male world, real and in Hollywood:  ' Bond, Jugs Bond.  Registered DDD37---license to shock, awe and kill!!!!  The Quantum of Solace is retitled The Quantum Cups of Solace.

Okay, so maybe you're just a normal, everyday house frau, working mom, etc.  You're asking yourself "..but lulu, how can I HAVE A stunt bra in my little world?"   Well, ladies, it's simple.  Think in terms of your routines and how the BRA might be useful.

Time Saver: Our mystery Bra-Woman says she doesn't even have to undress to try these on.  All she does is put one cup on her head like a cap and if it fits...VIOLA....she's got her bra!!!   

Green:  Hate those plastic bags you get at the store?  Just pile your purchases inside your AMAZING STUNT BRA!   In an effort to keep mall security from trying to arrest you, we suggest you pin your receipt to your shirt as you exit.

FASHION:  ARE YOU constantly rummaging around that overly-large and cumbersome purse?  Do you worry your shoes and bag doesn't match?  Do you have formal events but hate to carry a pocket book?  The AMAZING STUNT BRA is your answer!!  There is even a strapless version!!!! whew...those evening gowns can really be revealing.

AIR travEL:  wE BET you will NEVER be hassled again with paying for OVERWEIGHT/extra baggage fees, carry on bags or cumbersome BAGS to juggle going through the airport.  The TSA might even put you in an expediated line since all you have to do is unload/reload...so easy. (We are going to investigate AMAZING STUNT BRA for our next airplane trip which involves butter pats).

Economy:  Go to your closet and just look at the plethora of handbags, purses, clutches.  Now tally up your costs.  Now, imagine just 7 bras in your lingerie chest.  See?  All ready you've saved money...that you can spend on more stuff to put in THE AMAZING STUNT BRA.

This is NOT a paid promotional commercial.  We just appreciate form, fashion, function and design at its best. 

cOMING NEXT spring...AMAZING STUNT SWIMMING BRA/POOL FLOAT!

OX  lulu

11 comments:

LuluRedstar&Lauri Evans said...

Yes folks it is something to behold, and our bosom buddy did admit to us that she has carried a gun in it also, well she is from Texas.............Lauri

Garden Antqs Vintage said...

You girls a hoot!!! Could you hear me laughing all the way to Georgia! Of course I had to call Ms. Celebrity, who was laughing right along with me. I love this post!!

bella shabby said...

Too funny!! That is the best story... you 2 are always in the right place at just the right time. Sue

Primitiques 'n Poetry said...

Thank you for the laughs! ~Mindy

Cher said...

I've seen the "vault" in action and it is a sight to behold. But the pat down when the phone rings in there is truly hysterical.

The Texas Woman

trash talk said...

Talk about junk in the trunk-oops, wrong part of the anatomy. How can anything else fit in there with the Colt 45's she's toting? Now, that's what I call concealed weapons! Tn'T

Sweet Repose said...

I'm just getting a visual of the butter pat laden wonder bra running to catch a plane...does it come with shocks...and ear-plugs...HA...

wilson

ajunkqueen said...

I just love that STUNT BRA! I wonder where you can get one? I made a post on my blog inregards to Found Around,you guys have way to much fun.

Found Around said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Found Around said...

She amazes me! Had fun with her this weekend. I finally added to my blog also. Check us out! (and you)Miss you guys!

Halo Hill said...

You girls have too much fun! Love your zest for life soooo much! Happy Fall, Happy finds too!

Hugs,

Sheila